Saturday, May 19, 2018

May Goals and Happenings

I've loved this quote for a long time. It's part of a longer passage that's just so beautiful- I'll share it at the bottom. I feel like it helps me keep things in perspective. It's a good reminder to focus on the small and not worry about the grand. I think the middle picture of Graves with the flower and insect fit so well with it. Honestly, they all do but that one particularly. I love the colors this month and how springy the header feels. 

I really thought I was going to be more on top of this this month. I got the header done earlier in the month which is usually my hang up. I looked back and I haven't blogged in TWO WEEKS. Honestly, I've just been tired or haven't had the desire to. We've all been sick with some sinus crud and I think that just wiped me out. I hate when I feel that way but I think I'm doing better about letting things go when I just don't feel like tackling them (I mean, things like blogging that are optional).

So April and May are kind of blending together. Graves finished up soccer this week and last week I had my last Junior League meeting and the week before that was my last time at the McClean Center for the semester. Annie's taking a week off piano while her teacher is out of town and we finished up her phonics/spelling curriculum which was so nice. Peyton's worked a LOT of extra shifts and is doing a "Master Naturalist" class once a week, which is about as intense of a commitment as it sounds. The kitchen will probably (finally) be finished this week! And Annie is having a sleepover with two little friends next week for a late birthday party. Graves never decided on his and I'm hoping I can convince him on having a little pool party at Briarwood with a few buddies this summer. Peyton has also had a lot of meetings and trips to the pool lately getting it ready to open and we're super excited! Like I said, we've all been sick and on top of everything else, that felt like a lot.

Here were my April Goals:


1. Finish up the kitchen update. Yeah, we're still working on this. Not much I can do about it. But like I said, it should be done this week. So excited!

2. Purge, organize, and put everything back in the cabinets. Obviously not. But this week or next, I plan to do it. Probably next, let's be real.

3. Undecorate Easter. I did do this! I left out a couple of pottery bunnies that didn't really scream Easter and of course Annie questioned me on it. Ha!

4. Get ALL the boy stuff that Graves has outgrown down from the attic and purge and sort it and send what we're keeping to the storage unit. Well....I got down basically the first year's worth of stuff. It's something. And it's what Cookie needs right now (or rather in September, yay for another baby nephew!). But I don't want to wait around for him to hit a size to go through it. I want to tackle it soon!

Healthy Living

5. Be consistent with blogging/writing. Yeah, this was a hard fail. I already shared, but I just lost my mojo...again.
6. Start running again. I also didn't even get started on this.


7. Finish up Essentials (Annie's spelling/vocabulary/phonics curriculum) with Annie for the semester. We did it and it's been so nice to have a break from it!

8. Read poetry with the kids. We did and are doing this and it's been quite enjoyable.

Home Management

9. Plan Annie and Graves's birthday parties. We got Annie's planned and decided on a Briarwood party for Bud! Annie's is actually next week.

10. Do online safety training for the Junior League. I came in just under the wire, but I did this the final night it was available *and* I went to the May meeting so I have all my meeting credits I needed!

And here are my May Goals:

For Me:

1. Run. I'm not starting it this week but I'm really, really going to try the next.

2. Write. I'm determined to do better here.

3. Go to therapy. I'm doing this and it's helping. It's also still really scary to think about getting off my medicine but I've cut my dose in half so that's exciting.

For Them:

4. Continue reading poetry and plan poetry project (it may be June before we complete the thing).

5. Have Annie's birthday party and firm up plans for Graves's. 

6. Have Annie and Graves each pick a summer goal they want to focus on and one fun thing they want to try to do. We actually already did this. More on it later!

For Us:

7. Purge and organize kitchen stuff. Putting it back on the list and hoping to tackle it this week.

8. Get back in the habit of planning our weeks. Things go so much more smoothly when I do. Obviously.

For Him:

9. Pray daily.

10. Work through a She Reads Truth study. 

And y'all, that's it! Super low key. We'll see how it goes!

Maybe next month I'll be more timely. Probably not =)

Tuesday, May 1, 2018

Monthly Mental Health Check In: April 2018

One of the hardest things about recent events is that I have kept second guessing my decision to get on the medicine in the first place after Sallie was born. I'm not antimedicine, but there are so many places I see what I believe is overuse- the de facto use of epidurals and the abundance of little boys on ADD medication. And here- I see an incredible number of women of my generation, specifically young mothers, on antidepressants. I *know* there are those who need them but I didn't want to be one again. I fought so hard for my mental health after getting off them at the end of college and I was proud of that. Maybe too proud. Maybe I needed to be taken down a notch or ten. I still wonder if I could have just powered through.

The truth is that I'm pretty sure I could have. Because you *can* do most things. I could carry water three miles if that's the only clean liquid I could find for my kids. On smaller levels, I could (and did) learn to drive a standard, and wear a three year old all over New York City and navigate transit by myself, and give birth naturally, twice. This too, I could have done.

I'm confident I wouldn't have killed myself. I'm confident I wouldn't have hurt any of our children. I'm confident I wouldn't have driven off into the horizon and left them all. I know it didn't save my life or theirs.

I'm also confident that Sallie's baby days would have been filled with deep, deep pain and I knew it was likely my last chance at enjoying that season. I look back over the things I wrote and I see how those days, some of the best in my life, were filled with incredible sadness and my mind was unable to rest. I'm grateful I took Hemingway's advice and wrote "hard and clear about what hurts". Because it helps me remember how bad I hurt.

People always call those newborn days a time of survival mode and literally, we would have survived. But I'm afraid that would have been all. I'm afraid there would have been no joy in it and only chaos in my mind. Fortunately, I am able to look back and remember Sallie's baby days as a time of abundant happiness and peace. 

And I stop second guessing. 

But I've also had some time to reflect on the positives that this extra time we have to wait to be licensed to adopt will give us. First of all, I will be able to get myself in a more healthy place that I feel is sustainable long term (as I said, I never had the intention to be on Zoloft indefinitely- some people need that but I knew I had managed before without it and looked forward to that again). It will be much easier to make this change now rather than post adoption, I think. Also, it's serving as an impetus to really work on making my lifestyle more healthy (prioritizing sleep and exercise and starting therapy and practicing better self care). I think this time will be beneficial in that Peyton and I can read and discuss more and prepare our hearts and brains for this. It's giving me time to listen to people who have adopted and who are vulnerable about how complicated and messy it is. I'm learning more about trauma, which is something I'm beginning to realize is basically inevitable when adopting an older child out of the foster care system. 

I also think it'll be really helpful to prepare our children, not just in ways that are overtly focused on adoption. Annie scrambling her own eggs- such a small thing- has been eye opening for me. I've really been underestimating her as far as what she is capable of and setting my expectations too low. I want to help her learn more skills so she can help take care of herself and her siblings, in a way that's not overly burdensome. We're planning to potty train Sallie this summer and I'm likely going to wean her then and I think it'll be great to not be trying to do those things in the middle of a huge transition. And I think this extra time will be positive for Graves developmentally and as far as helping him learn some tools to work on his own emotional regulation. 

Overall, I'm choosing to view it as a gift. 

Sunday Hymns and Herrington Babies: The Glories of My God and King

 O for a thousand tongues to sing 

my great Redeemer's praise, 
the glories of my God and King, 
the triumphs of his grace! 

We headed back to church later this particular afternoon to help plan VBS. Being on the children's committee has been my privilege because I've gotten to see, even more deeply, the thoughtful care that goes into teaching Northside's smallest congregants. 

Recently, Graves came in my room with a little white piece of cloth. It was one of several elements the children had in a package designed to help them learn about the events of Holy Week- a little communion cup, a palm branch, a rooster feather, and this fabric representing a burial shroud. He told me "this is what Jesus's friends wrapped him in when he was in the tomb- cozy, isn't it?" and patted it so gently and then touched it to his own little face. It was so obvious that the random little piece of cloth had served its purpose in helping make the story more real to him. It's a story he's coming to understand more and more, in large part due to the investment of people at Northside who love him dearly and are patient with him as he grows and learns.

[And Sallie got soaked in rainwater on the way in. Like drenched as if she'd been swimming. I left her wrapped up in a blanket but some dear person found her this random blouse and tucked it in her bloomers. I'm equally thankful for Tequila and the faithful rotation of church members who have been providing Sarah Lamar with tender, thoughtful care since that first Sunday back after she was born, when she was two months old, and I hesitantly dropped her off in the nursery per everyone's encouragement instead of taking her to the sanctuary like I had planned to do.] 

Extremely blurry edition of Sunday Hymns and Herrington Babies
but I love that I have these precious images of Graves letting Babes borrow his light saber and showing her how to use it.

Sunday Hymns and Herrington Babies: Rejoice the Lord is King

Rejoice, the Lord is King!

Your Lord and King adore

Rejoice, give thanks, and sing

And triumph evermore 

Just the girls last Sunday and then Graves later on- the pictures are pretty indicative of the day. That wild child fought her nap like crazy and the little boy not pictured with his sisters had quite the challenging morning. It was beyond the usual inability to focus enough to get dressed in a reasonable amount of time and high energy/disruptive behavior during church. He was in the WORST mood. P reminded me that he reminded me that he had gotten to bed late last night. There was another night this week where the same thing happened and he seemed to struggle immensely the next day. After years of night parties and one AM Coney Island returns, rigid bedtimes have never been part of my parenting practices. But it also occurred to me  for the first time ever that when I have two  less sleep than what I deem appropriate and acceptable, I restructure my day. I have a lot more caffeine, I maybe take a nap, and I adjust my expectations and give myself a lot of grace. I don't necessarily do that for my kids and that's kind of a crap move.

Now that my life update is finished, last week in Sunday school we talked about the Ressurection. A couple of weeks ago, I was reading the story to the kids. Graves, who has been hearing this story since he was born said, "but Jesus wasn't *completely* dead, right?" I just kind of looked at him. Well yeah, He definitely was. "But Momma, dead people don't come back to life. I mean, in Heaven, but not here on Earth." I told of course that was true in general and that was kind of the point- the reason it was so incredible and amazing and changed everything about everything. 

But it got me thinking- maybe us modern grown up believers take this a bit for granted, or at least I do (and I know not every child has this reaction either, of course)-- that Jesus was "completely" dead. As I listened to the disciple's reaction to seeing their DEAD friend and realized how utterly shocked they were, I felt their reactions with fresh eyes, thanks to that little boy who was so difficult that morning. 

Thursday, April 26, 2018

What I'm Into: March

Almost at the end of April, but here's what I was into in March! 

On the Nightstand:
I'm actually reading this month, but I didn't much in March.

On Their Nightstand: 

 A million years ago, I used to do a thing on here called "Won't You Read to Me? Wednesday". There were like ten people who read my blog but I loved sharing my favorite books for the babies, who are now big kids. Anyway, I have been saying I wanted to share more of our readalouds on IG and Facebook and I have pictures on my phone that I just haven't put up yet, so I thought I might try making a discipline out of it and sharing something each week. Some weeks it'll be a middle grades novel I'm reading with Annie, some weeks a picture book that I'm reading with Graves (and often Annie), and some weeks it'll be something I love for Sallie that is appropriate for toddlers. These were the first library books I got for Sallie. With her older brother and sister, we've been reading a lot about civil rights, but in February I wanted to honor Black History Month in a very simple way with her too. And for me, that meant picking some baby books with a beautiful diverse looking cast instead of the more common books featuring little girls and boys that share her own sweet blue eyes. These two were big hits- the rhythm and rhyme in both is fun and I loved the illustrations. She has SO many books at home, but I love selecting a couple of library books for her when I can. 

Whose Knees Are These? by Jabari Asim
This is such a sweet fun book and I read it to Sallie quite a few times. 

Jazz Baby by Carole Boston Weatheford
I actually didn't know this one would be so short and simple and appropriate for Sallie. I found it on a list somewhere (or found something else by the author) and put it on hold. But it turned out to be perfect for her!

I already talked extensively about Forever or a Long Long Time. The three others were also picks from Diverse Bookclub about fostering and adoption. A Mother for Choco and Wish are really sweet but might not even be obvious to a young child that they are about adoption, which I certainly think is a valid approach. They are perfect (in length, content, ect.) for a very young child, even one Sallie's age. 

Wish by Mathew Cordell
This story is about an elephant couple who are waiting on a baby and finally, he comes to them. Graves was so excited for them to finally have him. 

A Mother for Choco by Keiko Kasza 
This sweet book is about a little baby bird looking for his mother. Most of the animals explain that they are not his mother but then he meets a bear who hugs, holds, and dances with him after asking him how he thinks a mother would act and then offers to parent him. When he arrives at her home he meets his new siblings, none of which are bears! 

Elliot by Julie Pearson
This one is about foster care and our library didn't have it. When I looked it up on Goodreads I saw numerous reviews from librarians saying that it was the only picture book their library had about foster care (in contrast to a handful about adoption). For informational books that our kids are going to hold on to but that we know will get beat up anyhow, we love to order $.05 used copies but we opted to order a new one and donate it to the library (where it will of always be at our disposal but will hopefully serve other families as well)! Though I'm *very* new to all this, it seemed well done. The one caveat is that when Elliot is removed from his family (this is written as gently as one possibly could write this circumstance and he is also a bunny, but he seems much more human than Choco) it is always because his behavior basically becomes too much for the birth parents. It's NOTHING bad or unusual (yelling, wanting attention, ect.) and I'm confident this is done to create a climate of respect for birth parents, but I do understand how as one reviewer mentioned, it could send a sad message to a child. 

Guys! Look what I found in the attic!!! Such a funny, cute book! I remembered my MIL gave it to Annie and have been meaning to go hunt for it for months. My Silly Little Sallie thinks its so much fun!

Silly Sally by Audrey Wood
It's obviously a goofy, kind of absurd book, and I adore it. It's also super fun because our copy is a really big board book!

On the Shelf:

I think I found a good sweet spot- three books, one is fiction and I'm reading it the fastest, the other two may take me a couple of months! I'll update on them next month.

The Read-Aloud Family: Making Meaningful and Lasting Connections with Your Kids by Sarah Mackenzie

The Connected Child: Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family by Karyn Purvis

Salvage the Bones by Jesym Ward

At the Theater (or from the couch):

Nothing this month! 

On the Small Screen:

Unsolved Mysteries 
Still kinda addicted to this. 

(Also notice these prints Mick hung. He figured out what would look good and hung them perfectly without a tape measure or straight edge and it took approximately an eighth of the time it would have taken P. And nobody swore at each other or threw a hammer.)

In My Ears:

Hmmm, mostly just the oldies radio station.

Around the House:

 My favorite little space, this washstand in the kitchen, is busier than usual. Flower pots, eggs, bumble bees, carrots, bunnies, a quote about being deeply loved Jesus, and my big calendar- I love the spring colors and the bright freshness and the textures and patterns and how whimsical it feels. 

 Silly Easter banner, multiple bunnies, lemons in the leaf bowl, sparkly eggs, and this house painting that feels like a very "centering" constant in the room we probably do the most living in. 

Pretty excited to get out my buffalo plaid and bicycle pillow! 

 When I ordered Brother Bear's bedding, I decided to get us a new duvet cover, too. Rainbow seersucker FTW.

Some of my favorite things in my whole house. No matter what we do to the kitchen, the MacKenzie-Childs is staying. Always .

 Sweetest alphabet embroidery courtesy of Minne!

 I've said it before, but I love having my "quote quilt" as an alternative (well, in addition) to a Commonplace Book. Filling my spaces with good words has been a real priority for me for the last few years. I actually need to make another one of these (probably just as huge!). I used to add my kitchen quotes to a bulletin board monthly and rearrange them every few months to make them look neat and symmetrical and it just got to be too much of a hassle. 

 At this point, I think you guys know that momma loves a pattern. Black and white gingham, yellow check, b&w houndstooth, and multicolored medallions (plus red polka dots behind the bigger chair, florals on the curtains and a lamp, stripes on some pillows and hanging plates, and a pretty abstract watercolor type design on the upholestry on two other chairs). It's a lot and I adore it. 

 Peyton recently requested we have a bin for shoes in the sunroom. I was planning to buy one but I realized it's need to be pretty big and I wanted something you couldn't see in. I ended up deciding to try out this flower trash can we had been storing balls in out in the carport. It used to be Minnie's and I have pictures of birthday parties when I was Sallie's age with it in the background (I have no idea what my parents used it for!). Minnie knew I loved the bright colors and funky flowers and passed it down to me. I'm obsessed with it in here. It's faded over the years and actually matches the color of the sunroom perfectly and I just adore the little picket fence along the bottom. I did have to find a new home for the vintage kids' desk but that's actually been for the best, too. 

 Favorite Target dollar spot candle for spring!

Picking a yellow is HARD but we finally found the right one!

In the Kitchen:

Well, not in ours. But I had to share Mick's AMAZING homemade lemon custard ice cream sandwiches between Pepperidge Farm sugar cookies!

In My Closet:

I got this dress off Zulily awhile back. Royal blue isn't usually my favorite but it's SO comfy and I love how bright and happy it is!

Both of us in our shortalls! We do seem a bit confused about the season- Sallie's are basically madras (not exactly because they're not patchwork) and mine are corduroy but yay for spring!!! 

In Their Closets:

We didn't do anything for Saint Patrick's Day but we certainly wore our green check to church the next day!
 When she goes out for a casual brunch, Sallie wears her sweetest warm up suit (what Mickey always called sweat pants/sweat shirts). I'm soooo dense because it just occurred to me that they're called that because athletes wear them to warm up. I love it so much but I'll be more than happy to retire it for some summer duds.

And Graves goes in his bat warm ups as well and Peyton wears his new hoodie and some of Conrad's hand me down skinny jeans (Annie and I wore leggings- I'm REAL over winter and am boycotting actual pants with more conviction than ever).

So blurry, but she's getting so tall so fast! This dress is basically a mini skirt (I lovvvvve a short dress on a toddler but this will be a tunic if I blink) and these are sweetest, soft leather shoes with little scalloped details. I loved them on Annie and (this is rare) actually can't remember where I got them.

Those big girl kicks get me every time but I think she's so cute in them. Especially sans socks, she looks so grown. 

Speaking of, I love the progression here- Keds with the rubber toe, royal blue Velcro tennis shoes that still look sweet and round and retro, and legit sneakers that grown people wear. Almost two, almost seven, and almost nine- each stage is pretty magical 

I think I put up a picture just like this in the fall because it's a perfect transitional outfit (not seersucker or sailboats which I just cannot do before Memorial Day)and I adore this Little Rebel bubble. I also picked it (even though it's the wrong red) because she is obsessed with these red Puddle Jumpers that are literally falling apart. She can put them on by herself and she thinks she is absolutely fine in them. I just love this darling girl to bits.

Polka dots and chicks. TBH (and I've mentioned this countless times) I hate this sort of frufru stuff on her. It doesn't feel like me anymore but also it's just really not a fit for her. Too much tulle, too many ruffles. But I had to put it on her once just to see. Obs completely biased, but I think she'd look precious in a garbage bag.

When it's bunny season, Sallie gets dressed in Cookie's (and my?) old Peter Rabbit jammies.

 Pre bedtime swinging and another bunny OOTN. These are some of the first two piece Gap/Old Navy jams I got for Annie. I started Graves in them around a year but Annie wore one piece things almost exclusively until the summer she was two. 

One more bunny OOTN. This is Sallie's third pair of Peter Rabbit jammies- my thirty year old ones and the ones I bought especially for her last year that we're identical to these except that they were powder blue instead of mint green. I say this all the time, but I try not to buy Sallie much since she has a plethora of clothes from Annie's toddler wardrobe. But Posh Pickle jams and Peter Rabbit are both huge weaknesses, so I had to spurge.

In My Mailbox:

When your church community is full of precious retirees who love the minor holidays and lovvvvve note writing. 

I ordered a big poster sized copy of my favorite poem off Etsy!

In My Cart:
 I think this is our last round of this stuff for Graves. He really still likes it but he's much more self conscious than Annie and he's realized that "his cub scouts" don't necessarily wear this sort of thing. He loved them when I showed them to him (I think mostly because Annie does) and wanted all animals this time but he won't wear it to certain places and he did say he thought they were kind of "girlish" but he didn't care about that at all (he has his fingernails and toenails painted currently, so clearly he doesn't). Anyway, it makes sense- girls Fiream goes up like size 12; boys seems to stop at 6. 
I am trying to figure out a system with his "uniform". I pretty much feel like I have church down (patterned button ups with cute flat front shorts, sometimes in fun colors with the occasional bow tie for special occasions). I really want to give him a lot of autonomy with his play clothes but I would like to kind of steer him. Ideas- Cat and Jack(ish) tees that are a bit more mature for everyday out of the house flanked by lit tees for nicer but not church occasions and Star Wars tees for at home/places where I give no ducks. 

 Bold patterns and pretty colors? Yes, please! Treated myself to two new tops and two pairs of shorts and man, I'm so excited for spring!

Around Town and At Home: 

Sal sporting her Breakfast bib for a little brunch at Primos. She's definitely our hardest toddler to take out to eat (probs because we give her less practice but also because she's so stimulated by everything). 

Happy International Women's Day from these two fiesty little ladies. They are strong, smart, and brave. While I'm incredibly grateful for their brother's mostly go with the flow nature (goodness, every family needs at least one of those folks), I'm glad God gave these two tiny women each a fierce determination of purpose and a will to problem solve. I hope they grow to use their gifts to help others, especially those on the margins of society, and that they are never afraid to be their true selves.

She was such a grumpy cub most of the day, but I took her outside and she was her happy Little Sallie Sunshine self. 

Graves said "we are nature people". Accurate.

This girl got a minor injury on her foot from a rock and then played it up big time so Minnie would dote on her extra. She's such a riot. She kept patting Minnie back when Minnie was patting her!

Palm Sunday at Northside was so much fun!!!

We went to our new(ish) Civil Rights/Mississippi History Museum and it was alot. Like really, really well done I thought. I'm still hyper processing. I have a history minor and have been interested in this stuff since I was about Annie's age, so I wasn't expecting it to hit so hard. But there were things I didn't know. I had no idea that our impoverished, last in everything state used to be one of the wealthiest in the country. Of course it was built on the backs of humans that were treated worse than animals. And those red, black, and white marbles representing native Americans, white Europeans, and enslaved Africans really made an impression.

But it was more than that. Graves watched a video about a church burning and seemed to grasp a surprising amount. There were loud voice overs of angry white people that had me rattled. There were dark rooms you went in to watch graphic photographs of lynchings click through on a projector with intense sound effects. And the discussion I had with Annie about how we mate animals but it is atrocious to "mate" human beings. Lord, forgive us. Between generalized anxiety and HSP tendencies, I really try to avoid movies and television shows that tie my stomach in knots with needless violence, but this is such a huge component of my history and theirs that I feel it's necessary to expose myself and to hold their hands but expose them, too.

 She asked about him soooo much when he was working over the weekend. Sallie is so smitten with her papa.

 Supper time at Mickey and Minnie's. For some reason, her little expression looks SO much like Mick to me here. I think it's her eyes and also I think this is totally his "sweet smile" (as opposed to his big honking cheesy grin he does in pictures, which his granddaughter CLEARLY nails, as well 

Well, that escalated. Sallie now says "dog" when she wakes up in the middle of the night because her dad lets her watch Puppy Days. Here she's eating in bed at 11:30.

Some bunny had a fever for Easter weekend.  She was so cranky  and then nearly fell asleep in her swing outside and was acting so mellow during lunch so I finally checked it. I remember when the big kids were toddlers/preschoolers one or both of them seemed to be sick almost every year on Easter. We got two good years in the past two- one at Northside and one at Calvary- which is the best streak since having babies, I think. So I really shouldn't complain. But still, ugh. 

At the Schoolhouse:

 I spent some time firming up some ideas I had about how I wanted to do stuff at the this summer. We never, ever take summers off, but I realized with wonderful little neighborhood friends who go to public school and best friends who we don't see near enough but will be at the pool everyday, I want to lighten the load a bit. It felt soooo good to get it figured out. (On paper it really doesn't look like much difference- I'm only changing up two things. But they are two of the biggest time wise and one is super hard to do on the go in case we decide to spend a lot of time at the farm or take a trip to Nashville. Also, we're about to be at a good stopping point with both and both are third to fifth grade so I don't feel as much pressure as I do with grammar and math and things that are specifically third grade.) 

On the Blog (and Elsewhere):

On Baby Brushes and Routines with Sissy- I wrote about one of my favorite little activities with Sallie.

The Unconditional Love of Meg Murry (over at Mockingbird)- One of my goals (again) this year is to submit my writing to a few places I love and admire and that speak to my soul, and of course MBird is at the top of that list. It's such an honor that Mockingbird published this piece- a few thoughts about motherhood, Meg, and love

How Sweet It is To Be Loved by You: 2017 Year in Review- I threw up some pictures and finally wrote about our 2017.

On My Heart and Mind:
- Warmer days and sunshine have helped my mental state immensly.
- Working on the kitchen and the time this process is taking has been...challenging.
- I have got to do some things to get myself in a healthier place. I was doing okay last fall and I just stopped. I really want to start running again and I really need to prioritize sleep better.

In My Prayers:
- I'm praying about silly, trivial things and I think God loves that.
- I'm praying about our family and about a brother, of course.
- I'm also praying about steps I need to take for my own health and for our family.

On the Calendar:

Hmm, I might need to just take this one off, yeah?