Friday, October 2, 2009

Letter to (Six Month Old) Ann Peyton

Dear Ann Peyton,

I simply can't believe you've been with us for half a year. Your beautiful life has brought so much joy to me and your Papa, and so many others. The past six months have been the most wonderful months of my life. I have loved getting to know you a little more each day.

This month you started Mother's Morning Out at our church. I am working at it, so it hasn't been too much of an adjustment for you. It is good for us to get out, though, and you love leaving the house.

You also love being outside. You really seem to enjoy going for strolls or when we just go outside and hang out in the yard.

You have been going to church with us and most Sundays you will make it through the entire service. You are getting more vocal, though! When we have to take you out it's usually not because you are crying, you are just "talking" a little too loud for church! We have scheduled your baptism for next month and are looking so forward to such a special event in your life.

You love eating your rice cereal mixed with fruit. Whenever you are eating you make happy little sighs like you are trying to say "this is so good, Mommy!". So far you have enjoyed every fruit you've tried (apples, pears, peaches, and bananas). Next week we will be starting vegetables! You are also really funny when you watch other people eating. The other night you were watching your Minnie eat sushi and you kept reaching for it and sticking out your tongue. Then you started licking your lips and pretending to swallow something, just like you were eating it. Mickey said he thought it reminded you of your rice cereal. It was too funny!

You are growing so fast, now! Every morning when I look into your crib it seems like you've doubled your size overnight. You are still wearing some 3-6 mo. outfits, but you are in many 6 mo. outfits, as well. Recently, you started wearing a sleeper that was identical to one you had in a preemie size when you were born. It was sort of bittersweet to see you in that seemingly huge footie! Dressing you gets more and more fun every day! I just love having a girl because picking out your clothes is so much fun. Minnie and I can't get enough of playing dress up with you. You are still in size 1 diapers; it is so funny to mommy to see the HUGE diapers the other babies at Mother's Morning Out have in their diaper bags!

You are so very active these days. If you're awake you don't stay on your back for long; you can't get enough of rolling over. You can roll back from your tummy, but you really like to just get us to do that for you.

You also love to "talk". You've discovered how to make the cutest sound that sort of sounds like you're gurgling something or like you're purring. You also just learned to say "baa" and it's your favorite word, now. You like to laugh alot, too, especially when your Papa makes silly noises or when Mommy plays with you with your PigPig.

You have started to really enjoy your Exersaucer and are getting good at playing with all the toys and pushing the buttons to make the music play. It's so much fun watching you learn to work it for yourself. You still sometimes like your swing when your tummy is hurting, but it's not you favorite thing to do like it used to be.

We will be going to see Dr. Denney next week for your six month "well baby" check up. I have so many questions for him this time! I'm sure it will be a great day, although you probably won't like having to get your vaccinations AND a flu shot.

You have had a few more "firsts" this month. We took you on your first trip to Oxford and you had so much fun hanging out in the Grove. You also got your first pimple that weekend. Coincidence? I think not. It was just like the night before prom, you were nervous and so you had a break out. We know you were so embarrassed, but it's okay; you were still the most beautiful girl there (and there are plenty of pretty girls at Ole Miss).

Well that pretty much concludes this letter, but I do want to end on a serious note....

Ann Peyton, I have to tell you something. Although mothering you has been my life's accomplishment and the source of a joy I've never known, these six months have not been easy. Not because you have been difficult; you are the easiest baby. Ever. But there are things about this that I didn't anticipate. For one thing, the responsibility of a little life can bring untold anxiety to a person. I worry so much about you. I have to remind myself that the Lord will take care of you and He loves you even more than I do.

Also, there are times when I fear I fail you as your mother. There are times I question if I am mature enough to be doing this. I know that I love you more than you could ever imagine and that I take good care of you and make sure that your needs are met and that those are the most important things. But sometimes, worry creeps in. You see, I thought that because being a mother was the greatest desire in my life, I would be a natural at it. Yet, it doesn't always work that way. At times, I feel wholly inadequate for the blessed calling that is being your Momma. I want to read to you each night, but sometimes I'm too tired. I want to pray for you every single day, but some days I forget. I want to play with you and talk to you as much as I should, but sometimes I get busy. And then there are times when I do these things and it is, well, forced. And I feel so guilty about that. But, I remind myself there are times that I have to make myself spend time with the Lord and there are times I have to make myself do nice things for your Daddy. This is no different. I just wanted you to know about these feelings I fight. I want you to know this when you feel insecure about something--doing your best and believing in yourself are important things. And trusting God to work through your weaknesses is the most important thing.

Annie, you have been such a blessing to us. As Elton John says " wonderful life is while you're in the world". Life is wonderful with you in our world, sweet girl; every day more wonderful than the last. I can't wait for the next six months with you!

Momma (and Papa)

One Month Old Ann Peyton

Two Month Old Ann Peyton

Three Month Old Ann Peyton

Four Month Old Ann Peyton

Five Month Old Ann Peyton

(now) Six Month Old Ann Peyton

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