Friday, August 27, 2010

30 Day Blog Journal- My Worst Habit

Day #27- My Worst Habit

I have (at least) two awful, ugly habits:

1. Biting/Picking My Nails. I pick and bite my fingernails and I pick at my toenails. I know, yuck. I've actually gotten a lot better. When I was little the habit was so tied to my anxiety, I would bite my fingernails without even realizing it. I would bite them all the way down to the quick and sometimes, they'd bleed. Awful. My mom tried everything- putting burning stuff on my fingers (I rubbed my eyes), having me wear gloves (I took them off), even taking me to the doctor, who scared me and told me I'd probably eventually have to have painful surgery to correct them. NOTHING worked.

The worst part of this habit is that it is so easily picked up by other (espesially younger) people. In fact, the reason I started biting my nails was because when I was five years old and was taking swimming lessons, I saw the teenage assistant biting hers. My mother told me that another little girl and I started simultaneously biting ours as well. The other child's mother yelled across the pool "get those fingers out of your mouth". My mom was too softhearted to embarrass me that way, but she says a part of her will always regret not doing so. Later when I was student teaching, one of my first graders saw ME doing it and started biting her own fingernails. I was pretty embarrassed and told her it was a bad habit that I needed to get rid of. I know that Ann Peyton will start to mimic me one day, too, and I need to stop before that happens.

2. Being perpetually late. I feel like it's one of the rudest, ugliest things a person can do because it shows you do not respect the other person's time (assuming you are meeting someone). However, it is a *huge* struggle for me. I got better for awhile and then when AP came, things went south quickly. It was just always so hard for me to estimate how long it would take me to get us both ready. Babies can be so unpredictable. And when I'd allow too much extra time, we'd end up sitting around for fifteen minutes, so I'd start working on something, not wanting to be idle, and of course, we'd end up late, just the same. In the past few months, I've really been making an effort again and I think I'm doing better. I'm sure it's something I'll always have trouble with, though.

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