Sunday, August 22, 2010

Weekly Happenings Post #75 (August 16-22)-- Through the Ringer

[au naturel; all about keeping it real in the pic and the post]

I feel like this week, especially the latter portion of this week has just been thing after thing emotionally. I feel so, so drained. Y'all know I try not to complain on my blog, but at the same time if I wanted to write this post from a realistic place, I had to be honest. My mom got sick in the middle of the week and had to go to the hospital and she just hasn't been herself at all, then on Thursday night we had a big scare with Babykins #2 (everything is fine!) and then Friday Peyton and I had a heart to heart that was not easy. Saturday morning I was just exhausted and I ended up having a really hard time with my anxiety due to something little that scared me. It was just a hard week. My mom was talking to me on Friday night about her getting sick and she said that for her, emotional fatigue is SO much more tiring that physical fatigue. I think I'd have to agree. If you don't like reading about really personal details of people's lives, stop here. It's just how I blog.

Monday
got off to a pretty slow start, as did most every day this week. Peyton had the day off and we enjoyed a nice lazy morning. I took a bath, folded clothes, and then Peyton and I played with Annie. She went down early for her nap and she slept for four hours! Peyton and I had lunch and chatted a little and then I read some blogs and wrote a blog post. Ann Peyton woke up and I fed her a (really) late lunch and went through some coupons while she played.
Annie's shoes are getting a little small, so we decided to go sans socks a la Evie Niemeyer

We all three took a trip to Kroger and I heated up the Chicken Spaghetti I had frozen when I made Carrie hers. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't anywhere NEAR as good as it normally is. Peyton decided it was because we froze it. I was mortified, worrying that Carrie's batch was gross, too. Remember, I'm SUPER insecure about my cooking. Of course, she told me later theirs was fine and I tried to let it go. I fed Ann Peyton dinner and put up the groceries. She played and I vacuumed out the couch since I was washing the slipcovers anyway, after the kitty's accident on Sunday. I put AP to bed and Peyton went over to his parents' house to pick up the big things we had left with them on our trip (the stroller and the Pack N Play). I did the dishes, straightened up some piles of papers, and got on the computer.

On Tuesday morning when Annie woke up, I went and got her and put her in the bed with us. We had fun playing for almost half an hour. I took a shower and did some laundry and then I ran some errands while Peyton kept AP. I went by Jodi Badon to buy a couple of gifts and then to Leap Frog to check out the fall stuff. I spent a little too much, considering the plethora of upcoming consignment sales. When I got home, I fed Ann Peyton lunch and did the dishes. Peyton headed to work and Annie took a nap. It was another nice long one! I wrote a post, straightened the house, and put the slipcovers back on the couch. Then I made some brownies for the Ultreya meeting. I also deep cleaned the high chair and this drying rack thing that we hang clothes on that don't go in the dryer. Peyton called and said my mom had been by the pharmacy and he checked her blood pressure and SENT HER TO THE ER! By the time Ann Peyton woke up, it was almost time to go. We went to Ultreya and then stopped by the Roberts' house on the way home to give Mary Milton a late birthday present. I called to check on my mom and they had given her some medicine and sent her home. I fixed AP supper and then put her to bed. I folded more laundry then read blogs until Peyton got home.

I felt like Monday and Tuesday were SO productive, but Wednesday was kind of a flop. I just woke up feeling AWFUL- I had a terrible headache and my stomach was hurting. It was the second time I felt really naseous. Peyton wasn't working until 2:00, so he let me sleep late and then I had a super lazy morning. I basically got out of bed and moved to the couch. I ate some Saltines and drank a Sprite. I had a bath and Annie had a bath. That was it for the morning.

I fed Ann Peyton lunch and then put her down for her nap. I did some dishes and ate lunch myself and then laid down on the couch again. She slept for about two hours. When she got up, we played in her room a little. I read her a few books and took the summer clothes that were too small out of her closet. I got out some 18 mo. stuff from her big closet to try on her.

[too little]

[stuff to try on]

studying the robot

frustrated with the robot?


My headache was still really bothering me and I decided it might be a sinus headache from the bad weather. I called Peyton and got him to fill my Sudafed and then Annie and I went to pick it up. We went by Sonic on the way. Peyton had some medicine for my mom, so I took it by their house. I felt a little better when we got home. Annie played while I set the Pack N Play back up and straightened up our bedroom. I put up almost all the laundry I had been folding the past two days. Then I fed her supper and put her to bed. I started my Bible study and went through about a month's worth of receipts and then I started feeling sick again. I was planning on cooking fish for supper, but I was so tired, so Peyton just cooked his own when he got home. I had more Saltines and Sprite. I had maybe three days where I was really nauseated when I was pregnant with AP, so this was pretty new!

Thursday started off great. Peyton switched shifts, so he went in to work early at about 8:30. Annie woke up when she heard him leaving and I could hear her stirring around. I thought maybe she'd play for twenty minutes, so I rolled over. An hour later I woke up and she was still asleep. I went ahead and made myself eat a real breakfast and got ready quickly and she woke up around 10:30. She slept 14 hours! I guess it was because of the short nap the day before. I was so thankful, because my night had been kind of rough. I just kept waking up a lot. Every time my head was still throbbing, even at 8:30. But by 9:30 I felt like a new person! After she woke up, I fed her breakfast, unloaded the dishwasher and did some dishes. I got some laundry going and then I packed a lunch to take to Peyton and got some food together for AP's lunch, since we were going to my sister in law's house later. We played a little and Annie was so sweet and cuddley.
She has figured out how to get up there by herself now!

It was so nice! Then I swept and dry mopped the wood floors and got ready to run some errands. We went by Peyton's store to drop off his lunch and then back to Jodi Badon for another present (they have THE cutest stuff) and finally to my SIL, Elizabeth's house. Annie's cousin, Simeon, was asleep but she had lots of fun playing with his toys! When we got home she took a little nap and I washed our bedding and then read some blogs. I did a lot of "marking as read" in my Reader. Peyton got home around the time AP woke up and we decided to go for a walk. After the walk we went to the grocery store to pick up a few things for supper. I went to the bathroom while Peyton got Annie started on supper. What I saw scared me to death- blood. I completely freaked out and started sobbing hysterically. Thankfully, Peyton was home because Annie saw me upset and I think it really scared her. It hurts me so much that I did that to her, but Peyton said later that there will be times when she sees us upset, for example when our grandparents eventually die and it's okay for her to see that. All the same, it was awful. Thursday night was hard. I kind of thought that the end of the pregnancy was inevitable, but after talking to my mom and Peyton's mom, who was an OB nurse, I realized it might not be anything so serious. I texted Carrie to cancel our plans for Friday and then tried to stay busy until I got super tired. Peyton fed Annie and put her to bed and then went and picked up Newks for us to eat. We snuggled and talked for awhile and then I did laundry and got on the computer. I started working on treating this dress I bought for Ann Peyton that had bled in the wash and cleaned up the den a little bit. I read my Bible and I prayed more than I have in a long, long time and then I went to bed. Suprisingly, I slept okay.

Friday morning, Peyton went for a bike ride while AP and I were still asleep. I woke up around 7:30 (I set an alarm) and started calling my OB's office. They didn't open until 8:00, but I went ahead and got in the shower and when Peyton got home he got AP up and fed her breakfast. I got in touch with the office and they scheduled a sonogram and appointment with the nurse practitioner (Dr. McMinn had the day off) for 9:00. I am SO thankful this happened on Thursday of all days, because my mom was still sick and the Herrington's had house guests from out of town. My sister is in nursing school, though, and she has Fridays off, so she came over and kept Ann Peyton. I don't know how I would have waited all weekend if it had happened later, either.

Anyway, the whole thing took about two hours and here's what we found out. I had something called an "implantation bleed" which is apparently pretty common. They did say with any bleeding there is the risk of miscarriage, so they wanted to find the baby and hopefully the heartbeat. I measured about 5 weeks and 5 days (earlier than they guessed when I told them the date of my last period). They were able to see the baby AND find a heartbeat, though. They said that usually the heartbeat is not detectable until at least six weeks, sometimes seven, and since I was so small it was harder to detect because my vessels were smaller and it was picking up my breathing. They also said if we had come in on Wednesday, maybe even yesterday, they probably wouldn't have been able to see the baby. He or she was about as big as this zero (0).
They're going to do another US next week just to make sure everything is going normal when I have my first really appointment with Dr. McMinn. And they said I needed to be on "pelvic rest" until then. So, no sex. Poor Peyton gets too much pelvic rest as it is!

After the appointment, Cookie hung out with us for a little bit and told us about nursing school and then we gave AP a bath and got her dressed and went to lunch. We had lunch at a place in Ridgeland called Cool Water Cafe. It doesn't look like it would be anything special, but it's great and they have a fantastic salad bar with TONS of stuff! When we got home, we put AP down for her nap and Peyton got ready and left for work. Annie slept for a long time and I wrote a blog post and played on FB for part of her nap, but I was super productive for most of it. I had been in such a hurry to get to the doctor, I hadn't done any of my normal "morning chores", so I made the bed, straightened our bedroom, loaded the dishwasher and started some laundry. Then I got started with sweeping and wet mopping all the tile/lenolium floors. It took me longer than usual, but since AP was asleep, I did a better job than usual. I got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed under the cabintets where the mop doesn't get as good. I also cleaned the outside of the dishwasher in all the little nooks and crevices. Then I dusted in the den and sunroom. Annie woke up as I was finishing up. We straigthened up her room and headed to my parents' house for Red Beans and Rice. Cookie wasn't there and Peyton had to work and my mom was still in the bed, so there wasn't as much activity as usual. We talked to my mom some and she got up and ate a baked potato (which Ann Peyton insisted on sharing with her) and then we had supper and left. I did AP's night time routine and put her to bed and then read blogs until Peyton got home.

When he got home, Peyton worked on fixing a drawer in my dresser that has been broken for some time. He told me he wanted to talk about something while he worked on it. I knew it wasn't going to be good. He said he felt like we weren't connecting the way we used to and we were both just kind of distant. We've had problems with this before and we've never completely resolved it. I think part of it is that we (I especially) tend to focus too much on the parent role and not enough on the spouse role. I know, I know......every book I've read talks about how that's killer for a marriage. I think it's hard for us, partly because we didn't have much time to practice being "husband and wive" before we were "dad and mom". Of course we wouldn't change it; but now we've got to make some adjustments. Our long weekend in Georgia really showed us that we needed to make each other a priority more that we were, but when we got home we didn't really change anything. I'm glad Peyton brought it up, but especially as hormonal as I am it was hard to talk about.

Annie didn't sleep as long as she usually does and we stayed up way to late talking, so I was super tired on Saturday morning. I went and laid down on the big bed in her nursery while she played with some toys. I got a big basket of toys out of her closet and shut my eyes for a few minutes. When I opened them, I saw she had her little phone that we usually don't let her play with unless we're watching her really closely because it has a long string on it and as I've mentioned she has a scary habbit of loving to put things around her neck. I got so panicked just thinking about what could have happened. We super baby proofed her room she we don't have to watch her as carefully 24/7, but sometimes I think I just shouldn't ever let her out of my sight for two seconds. Until she's twenty four.

After that, I fed AP breakfast and started the dishwasher. I ate some breakfast myself and she went down for an early nap since she got up so early. I got on the computer and then took a shower. I straightened up the house and ate lunch. Then I went to pick in on Ann Peyton and I found out a secret she's been keeping: these long "naps" she loves so much are not really naps; they're "rest time" in her crib. She was sitting up with her paci in her mouth, her bunny in her lap, reading a book. I know she sleeps some (most?) of the time, but I guess she's just having quiet time in her room the rest of the time. Fine by me! Of course, once I peaked at her, she wasn't going to just keep reading. So I got her up and we got the house straightened because my friend Darlene was coming over. She's an older lady (middle aged) at my church and she's like a mentor, so I knew it would help to talk to her about what was going on with Peyton and me. She came over and we talked for over an hour while Ann Peyton played. She had lots of helpful tips for "rekindling" the spark and she said this was something most everyone went through, which made me feel LOTS better. After she left, I folded some laundry and then we went to a birthday party for two little girls (twins) from our church. We had fun, but we were outside a lot, and Annie and I were both zapped. We got home around the time Peyton did and we gave her a bath and put her to bed. I cooked a really good breakfast casserole that I had found on Emily's blog and we made hashbrowns to go with it. I worked on a couple of posts and we spent some time just hanging out. I read my Bible and went to bed.

Today (Sunday) did not get off to the best start. Peyton had to go into work early, but I was planning on getting AP and myself ready and going to Sunday School and church. I had the worst morning sickness I've had yet. I didn't throw up, but I kept gagging and running to the bathroom. I went ahead and got ready and amazingly AP slept until I woke her up around ten. I was surprised because she went to be pretty early (8ish). I think it must have been the short nap again! I felt better once I got ready and headed to church. The sermon was good, but I hate it when Peyton has to miss it! After church, I fed AP lunch and had lunch myself. I called my friend Logan, whose birthday was earlier in the week and then put Annie down for a nap. I pretty much just relaxed during her nap. I was exhausted. I watched an episode of I'll Fly Away and read some blogs. It was storming and the thunder woke Ann Peyton up. We played a little and then my mom (who was feeling much better) and Cookie came over so we could go check out the new TJ Maxx by my house. I have to say it was a bit of a let down. I know it's going to be hit or miss, just like the other one in our area. After they left, we watched a DVR'd episode of Army Wives and folded laundry. Then I organized some new clothes I'd gotten for Annie while she played in her room.

Peyton got home and we all hung out together for awhile and just played. While Peyton was feeding AP her supper, I vacuumed. I used the big, heavy vacuum that I hate, but it made the floors look much better! I put AP to bed and then I fixed us asparagus and grilled cheese sandwitches (weird, right?) for supper. Peyton and I ate dinner and then did our Bible study together. Then I finished this post and I'm hitting the hay after this!

Whew! I hope next week is a little less....trying.

9 comments:

Ashley said...

You always have a great way of being honest on your blog without sharing TOO much. It's a talent! I was so, so worried when I got your email last week. I prayed so hard over that baby. I'm so thankful!

Kurt and I are kind of in that spell right now too...it happens!! We are excited for our Disney trip in October. Traveling and date nights always do wonders for us! So you are not alone. LOVE you!

Cuddles and Chaos said...

Sending you hugs and warm wishes for a better week. I'm thankful that your mom is doing better and Babykins 2 is doing okay.
if you ever need to chat, I'm here.
I can share from the experience of having a 10 year old, almost 8 year old and 6 year old that it's very hard for my husband and I to get to have conversations right now. We don't have family close by and due to other reasons, our families don't really "watch" the kids for us...and when they do it comes for conditions and issues that are often not worth the energy.
Take time with Peyton when you can though I know it's easier said than done especially being sick and tired (due to pregnancy and mommyhood).

Hugs,
Christi

Miss Southern Prep said...

I hope your mom is feeling better, and I hope everything goes well with the doctor.

On a lighter note, AP is too cute! I love her blue outfit in the last pictures!

Carrie said...

Aww, I'm sorry you had such a rough week! I miss you! We are way overdue for some girl talk!

Emily said...

Glad you liked the casserole! I have some in my fridge right now. :)

Amy said...

let me just prepare you ahead of time....this is probably gong to be a loooong comment :)

(so...in no particular order)

1. i love ann peyton's blue romper in the last pictures. libbi has one VERY similar and i love it on, but i can't stand for her to wear it, because it doesn't have snaps in the crotch so it is a BEAST to change her diaper in....

2. Is it weird that I LOVE your WHP's? I just love hearing about what y'all are up to (or maybe I'm just REALLY nosey!) ;0)

3. Hope your mom is feeling better...scary!

4. I had some "implantation bleeding" with Libbi, too and it scared the poo out of me! especially since i had miscarried before, but since you saw the babykins and the heart beat i'm sure all is well - praise GOD!

4. I love how honest you are....i envy it. i am too worried about what my mother-in-law would think when reading my blog (kidding.....kind of) ;)

5. i don't know about you, but i feel like satan totally knows that anxiety and worry is what i struggle with and he throws as much as he can at me all at once just to make me doubt myself even more! ugh!

6. most importantly, i feel like we are in similar seasons of life. it is really hard for me to switch out of the mommy role and into the wife role. i KNOW that i leave jeffrey out a lot because of the time and energy that i put into my relationship with libbi. it is so hard. and i remember people telling me this when we got married/pregnant, but i thought, "this will NOT happen to us!" never say never.....
i admire peyton for broaching the subject with you. i think it speaks a lot about his character and his love for you that he would WANT to spend more time with you and deepen your relationship!

sorry for the blog post of a comment :)

Amy said...

let me just prepare you ahead of time....this is probably gong to be a loooong comment :)

(so...in no particular order)

1. i love ann peyton's blue romper in the last pictures. libbi has one VERY similar and i love it on, but i can't stand for her to wear it, because it doesn't have snaps in the crotch so it is a BEAST to change her diaper in....

2. Is it weird that I LOVE your WHP's? I just love hearing about what y'all are up to (or maybe I'm just REALLY nosey!) ;0)

3. Hope your mom is feeling better...scary!

4. I had some "implantation bleeding" with Libbi, too and it scared the poo out of me! especially since i had miscarried before, but since you saw the babykins and the heart beat i'm sure all is well - praise GOD!

Amy said...

BTW...I KNEW this was a long comment, but apparently blogger thought so too (i had to break it up, b/c it said it was too big to process - ha!)

4. I love how honest you are....i envy it. i am too worried about what my mother-in-law would think when reading my blog (kidding.....kind of) ;)

5. i don't know about you, but i feel like satan totally knows that anxiety and worry is what i struggle with and he throws as much as he can at me all at once just to make me doubt myself even more! ugh!

6. most importantly, i feel like we are in similar seasons of life. it is really hard for me to switch out of the mommy role and into the wife role. i KNOW that i leave jeffrey out a lot because of the time and energy that i put into my relationship with libbi. it is so hard. and i remember people telling me this when we got married/pregnant, but i thought, "this will NOT happen to us!" never say never.....
i admire peyton for broaching the subject with you. i think it speaks a lot about his character and his love for you that he would WANT to spend more time with you and deepen your relationship!

sorry for the blog post of a comment :)

Mary Louis Quinn said...

Glad everyone in your fam (including baby #2) are ok!

Babies can put a strain on even the most solid marriage. John and I have been together for almost 8 years and this past year, since C joined our family, has definitely been the toughest! It is a very delicate balance between being a wife and mother, and I hate to say that I let motherhood win almost every time. It's definitely something I need to work on.

So just remember that this time with Peyton and you in just a phase. Y'all will bounce back, but it does take lots of work! I try to remind myself that marriage is a work in progress every day!