Sunday, March 6, 2011

Weekly Happenings Post #103 (February 28-March 6)-- A Whole Lot of Resting Goin' On

[No make-up. No editing.]

Well, this week was different from what I had planned. I'll be honest and say that this bedrest thing is harder for me than I EVER would have imagined. I KNOW it is 100% worth it for Baby Graves. [I read somewhere that babies born between thirty four and thirty six weeks are three times more likely to die (due to SIDS, accidents, respiratory problems, ect.) than those born at term.] That said, I always thought it would be kind of fun, especially since I love to read and nap and get on the computer and I like watching TV a little, too.
Um, no. First of all, it's honestly kind of tiring in it's own way. I just feel so "yuck" and sluggish. I've told Peyton no less than ten times that I'm convinced the reason I felt so bad when I was pregnant with AP was because I was so lazy and did just this. It gives me headaches and backaches and I just want to get up and walk around the block (which I'm NOT usually a fan of).
Second, I've always thought of myself as a BIT of a homebody, but since I've married Peyton I've gravitated more towards his style (GO!GO!GO!) and he's come a little toward mine. And I have to say it's been hard being confined to the house for several days. I'm VERY thankful for visitors!
Also, I hate not being able to "accomplish" things. There was so much I wanted to do these next few weeks and it's a challenge to put it all out of my mind. And then there's the typical everyday stuff. I genuinely WANT to be doing the laundry. For one, I hate seeing Peyton working so hard after a full day's work and for another thing I'm OCD and I want it done my way. I know that's awful, but it gives me anxiety to have anyone but me sorting our laundry. HA! The other thing that has been super frustrating it not having access to the big computer (the desktop). I'm so, so glad we have a laptop, but it's a MAC and I'm not used to it and some things are harder to do and I can't edit pictures on it. The pictures are what bother me most, I think. I want to be organizing the old ones, but more than that it bugs me to be "getting behind" and not being able to edit our family photos and pregnancy pictures and stuff.
Okay, last thing and then I'll stop. I feel like I'm already pretty on edge. In fact, Peyton would say I'm more emotional this pregnancy than I was the first time (I find that one hard to believe). Laying around just "thinking" and staring at my eyelids is so, so not good for me at this point. One thing that is bothering me SO much (and I know I'm just over thinking it, you don't have to tell me!) is that I feel like, at this point, it's like I have to choose between Annie and Graves. CLEARLY, the best decision right now is to let everyone else help with Ann Peyton because no on can really take care of Graves like I can right now. But it's still hard, especially since I was counting on really having a lot of special time with her these last few weeks. The worst part is that when I do have time with her, I just feel frazzled and it's hard not to loose my patience.
I know I sound so ungrateful and like such a brat, but I always want to be transparent and also, I want to remember these days and what they were like for me. Onto the week's happenings, now...
Ann Peyton woke up before 7:00 Monday morning, despite having really late bedtime and missing her nap the day before. I think she was still pretty tired though, because she laid in the bed and watched cartoons between us and then read books to herself for almost two hours. [I know I'm spoiled!] Peyton got up with her and he wanted to go for a walk. I was kind of planning on sleeping in some more, but I decided to go with them as long as they didn't go far. It was kind of cloudy so we just made a couple of circles in our neighborhood and then we talked while she played in the backyard. It was so nice to have some relaxed family time! Peyton cooked a big breakfast of pancakes and eggs and after I ate I got in the tub and got ready. Peyton got ready after me and Annie and I played for awhile and then I put her down for a nap. She went to sleep pretty quickly and slept for OVER FOUR HOURS. I finished last week's Weekly Happenings post and caught up on stuff on the computer. Then I ate lunch and watched My So-Called Life and fell asleep on the couch. I wouldn't have let her sleep so long, but I woke up to her talking and looked at the clock. Who knows how long she had been talking to MonkMonk, though? I'm sure she needed the rest, anyway.
I made some phone calls while she ate a really late lunch and then we went outside and I read The Screwtape Letters and Annie played. We came back in and I read some more in the sunroom (we don't use it near enough) and then I worked on sorting clothes from the recent consignment sales and putting them on hangers now that everything is clean. Ann Peyton helped me straighten up her room and then I gave her a bath and fed her supper and put her to bed. I got on the computer for a little bit and then fixed us soup from a mix that my SIL gave us a while back. We had a nice time eating together and visiting and then I read my Bible and went to bed.
I didn't get that much good sleep and I kept waking up all night and when I finally got to sleep good at around five thirty, it was time to get up again in an hour. I woke up a little late on Tuesday morning and I waited until the last possible minute to get AP up and then discovered her diaper had leaked. Peyton woke up and helped me dunk her in the tub really quick and we got a bit of a late start. We had a good day at Mother's Day Out, though, and we stayed to help through lunch. AP fell asleep on the way home and she woke up and wouldn't go back to sleep in her crib. She did talk and play in there for over an hour, though. I wrote my thirty four weeks post and had a snack when she got up we went outside. She played and I read The Screwtape Letters for about an hour.
We came in and I read some more and did dishes and laundry. I didn't finish the book, but I made a lot of headway. We straightened together and got ready and I dropped her off at my parents' house and headed to the bookclub. I turned off the radio and spent the whole drive just talking to the Lord. We had some great discussion at the meeting and I'll share a full review once I finish the book. It's one of my ALL TIME favorite books. I picked Annie up and once we got home I put her straight to bed. I read a few blogs and Peyton and I talked and then I went to bed, too.

Peyton had the day off on Wednesday and we all got up around 8ish. Well, Peyton watched AP for about half an hour while I slept and then he went for a bike ride and we watched The View, ate breakfast, and had a bath. When he got back, we all got ready and went to lunch at Bravo!. His brother makes pizzas there and we sat at the bar and talked to him a little and watched. It was really cool; it was almost like watching an artist or something. I left for my doctor's appointment, which was very eventful. It would have been one of the quickest yet- I got back to see Dr. McMinn so fast- except for the whole monitoring/ultrasound/being admitted into labor and delivery for a IV thing. Anyway, I came home after that and promptly followed instructions to get on the couch and pretty much stayed there the rest of the afternoon and evening. Peyton took AP to get some medicine for me and I worked on a blog post on the laptop. I did get up to help Peyton do AP's monthly pictures and get her to bed once they got home.
Then I settled back in on the couch and finished her twenty three month letter. Peyton cooked eggs and grits for supper and we talked some and then went to bed.
Thursday was my first full day of bedrest. It wasn't terrible, but it's definitely not what I'd choose to be doing. We woke up around 8ish and all snuggled in the bed and then Peyton and AP went for a walk and I slept. When they got home, I joined them in the yard. It's really nice we have a chaise lounge out there! We ate breakfast outside and then I read to Annie a little while Peyton made some work related phone calls.

We put AP down for her nap around eleven, but it was too early. We kind of knew it was, but Peyton wanted to get her up before he left so I didn't have to lift her. She did talk and play and had a little peaceful quite time for about an hour. I took a bath and headed back to the sofa and ate lunch. We played with AP some more and then Peyton's mom came over and picked her up. Peyton's dad had the day off, so they both got to have a fun afternoon with her and I got to rest. I ate dessert and started an episode of 90210 and then played on the computer a little. I took a nice nap and then I read a bunch in the book that Carol Anne (our doula) sent me. Peyton's mom brought Annie back and she brought us hamburgers for dinner. She got AP settled with her and I ate mine and then DeeDee gave Annie a bath and we got her ready for bed. She was super fussy and was just crying so hard and really didn't want to be rocked. Peyton's mom left and I thought at first that she'd settle down on her own. She didn't. I called Peyton to ask him what to do and he said I could go ahead and pick her and lay down with her on the twin bed in her nursery. We snuggled for a few minutes and rocked for a few seconds and she went right on to bed. [It's weird because sometimes, if she's really tired, she won't let me rock her at first. She needs to get in her crib and fret a little and then she wants to rock. I know, crazy.]
I worked on making a list of things I could do while I was on bedrest (research a new camera, update my address book, get caught up on finances, ect.) and then read the first chapter of Mark in the Bible. Our associate pastor, Daniel, who teaches Sunday School, recently suggested reading the gospel of Mark and trying to see it with fresh eyes and without outside input. It's so weird for me to read without reading the little "applications" or reading a commentary, but it's kind of neat, too. I read some more in the childbirth info, got BACK on the computer and then talked to Peyton and watched TV for awhile.

On Friday, Peyton got up with Annie because she woke up pretty early (a little before seven) since she went to bed so early. I stayed in bed until eight and then moved to the couch for a bit. I took a bath and then laid on the couch and played with Annie some while Peyton did a bunch of sweeping, mopping, and scrubbing counters to get ready for Graves's shower that had been moved to our house due to the bedrest mandate. He also fixed a salad, baked cookies, and made Suddenly Salad for us.
We were supposed to meet with the doula on Friday, but she had a conflict, so we had to reschedule. AP went down for her nap around 11:30 and Peyton and I talked some and I just hung out on the sofa. I got super stressed (tears) because we couldn't find the cloth that goes on the dust mop and Peyton used the wrong mop to mop the kitchen and got it super sudsy and it was kind of a big mess. It really didn't matter, but I'm such a control freak and I just wanted to get up and do it myself so badly. My friend Logan came over and we had a great visit and it put me in a MUCH better mood. Annie woke up while she was here and then my mom and Cookie came over. It was nice having company, but my mom and I had a little fuss because she thinks 1) we are too busy and 2) our house is too small. We got over it quickly, though. They left and ran by TJ Maxx and took AP with them. I wanted to go SO badly, especially since there were some cute dresses I wanted to show them so they could look for my size at the one near them. Of course, I stayed put, though. They came back and helped me straighten up a little bit and then took Ann Peyton to their house for Red Beans and Rice. I got on the computer and just relaxed some. I ate supper (turkey roll ups, pasta salad, a boiled egg and cherry tomatoes) and researched cameras trying to make the Nikon vs. Canon decision. [Weigh in if you have a preference!]
I did clear a few piles out of the living room, but I only got up for about as long as it takes to make a sandwich. So hard! I also figured out how to fold laundry in a reclined position and that made me feel a lot better about life.
My mom and Cookie brought AP back pretty late. They dusted and cleaned bathrooms and helped me get Ann Peyton to sleep and Peyton got home shortly after that. We talked for a little bit and then went to bed after Peyton put up the laundry.
Saturday morning was the shower. Annie woke up pretty early and Peyton got up and finished cleaning the house and got ready for work. Since AP had been up so late, she was still pretty sleepy and she laid in bed and watched a movie with me for two hours! Peyton left and my mom got here and I got ready and then some of the girls from our Sunday School class got here to start setting up. We visited and once everyone got here we ate and opened presents. It was beautiful and SO much fun! Graves got a bunch of adorable stuff, too! I'm so thankful we have such a loving church family.
After everyone left, my mom helped me get Ann Peyton to bed (she was SO good during the shower, especially for how tired I know she was!) and then she left and I laid down on the couch and relaxed. I read blogs and cranked out a couple of posts myself and Peyton's dad came to get pick Annie up on his way home from work. He got her ready and they headed over to their house. It has been nice having all this "free time", but I really did start missing Annie, especially knowing that all too soon my time with her with be divided.
After they left, I watched an episode of My So-Called Life and worked on family finances and then I read some. My mom and Cookie dropped by for a few minutes and I finished a magazine and read the next chapter of Mark in the Bible and had a snack of leftover party food. I took a super short nap and Peyton got home with a little Annie Baby he picked on the way home from work. We put her to sleep and watched the final episode of My So-Called Life. I read my regular Bible reading and we talked some and went to sleep.
Sunday was the first day I was going to try taking care of Annie by myself a little. I have to be honest and say it didn't go as well as I thought it would. We just assumed since she is so easy and plays so well independently it wouldn't be a big deal for a few hours at a time. Well, Peyton got up with her, but once he had to leave for work, things went downhill. Breakfast was an ordeal because her little tupperware box of Cheerios was empty and I was not going to climb on the counter to get the box from above the stove. It seemed like I kept getting up every few minutes. She needed two new diapers over about an hour and then she pitched a huge fit and lay down on the floor in our room and since I couldn't pick her up, I basically had to drag her back into the living room. At that point, I called my mom in tears. My mom said she'd be over soon and Ann Peyton got a lot calmer. I took a quick bath while she climbed up and down on the toilet and then she played for awhile and we started watching the Galloway service on TV. Everything went pretty smoothly until my mom got over here. She played with AP and fed her lunch and then put her down for a nap and went to run errands. I had lunch and relaxed and read a few blogs until she got back. She woke up Annie and took her home with her and I had the afternoon to myself again. I read blogs, worked on finances some more, and tried to figure out how to go about getting my Continuing Education credits so I can keep my teaching license. It seemed pretty daunting. From the looks of things, each "course" takes about ten hours and I need ten of them in the next year and a half our so.
My mom and Cookie brought Ann Peyton back and Peyton got home about thirty minutes later. He fed her supper and gave her a bath and then we put her to bed and he watched a movie and I let myself sit down at the desktop just long enough to upload my pictures from the camera to the computer and from the computer to the blog (I laid down on the floor while I waited for Blogger to upload, ha!). Once I finish this post, I'm going to watch Army Wives and read my Bible and go to bed!
Next week should be more of the same. I'm sure these next couple of weeks are going to make for some BORING Weekly Happenings posts. Tomorrow, though, is going to be super fun because I get to see Ashley (she's in town with her hubs for a review thing) and Carrie and then Tuesday Peyton has the day off and we're meeting with our doula!


Sarah said...

I think bed rest would make me crazy! It must be such a challenge with a toddler too. Sounds like you have a lot of support from your family. What a blessing!

Rachel Ratliff said...

I know bed rest is hard (I did it for 7 weeks with Ryan), but it sounds like you're doing a good job taking it easy! It is very true that white boys are wimpy when it comes to being born prematurely. They do the worst in our NICU and have a very rough start to life. Trust me, you want to avoid the NICU if you can. Heelsticks every day, IVs in those sweet baby arms, tube feedings, ventilators, infections, setbacks, and not being able to take your baby home for weeks or months. As much as I love working in the NICU, I would never want to see my baby go through all that! You are definitely doing the right thing by taking it easy. I'm sure it's rough not being able to solely devote yourself to AP these last few weeks, but you'll end up spending more time with her if you don't have a baby in the NICU! I'm praying for you...know that you are doing a great job (because bedrest is definitely a job)!

Mallory Pickering said...

Four things:

1) Seeing the pictures of Ann Peyton with CSL warms my heart in a way that I did not previously know it could be warmed. I'm happy to know you're starting her early!

2) I am also reading Mark. Loving it! I am trying to read the Gospels for a "fresh" perspective on Jesus during Lent.

3) I have a Canon and love it.

4) You are so lucky to have such a supportive family! Wow!