Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Weekly Smorgasbord

Okay, first things first. My (pretty involved) Delicious linking system is having some issues. So this post took FOREVER and I'm sure it's full of typos. And the font/format is making my eyeballs break. I'm annoyed to say the least, but I can't give this any more time.  I seriously hope to get it fixed this week. Anyway, here are this week's links. Kind of narrow in scope again, and not without controversy, but I thought they were interesting. Also, it was totally "sex week" at a lot of my favorite blogs. Don't say I didn't warn you. [For the record, I think this a MAJOR conversation we need to have. I've kind of hesitated to post about it myself, because when I say one mild thing people seem to be quite shocked and there are sweet old ladies from our church who read my words and so on and so on. But one day I hope I'm brave enough to post about something that was, at one point, one of the hardest facets of our marriage. Anyway...]

On Faith:

In which there is no "and" / Sarah Bessey

"Let go of your “should” and your “ought to” and your “need to” and your implied and overt “and” attachments to Jesus. Live like Jesus is enough, and remember you do not earn any part of your redemption."  One of my favorites this week. A great reminder to me. 

The Bible-less Christian- Modern Reject

Interesting question.  

On Family:

I Said Yes / Sarah Markley 

"It’s more than okay to walk away from things like that because the rule of it is that there WILL be another deal. It releases us from worrying about it coming around again.But this rule, I discovered during our brief park outing, is not always true. With children, with relationships, with forgiveness there might not be a next time. There might not be a “better deal” or another outing at the park in the same way." 

 Pohlkotte Press: Half Light of Morning

"you handle my heart carefully...knowing intrinsically...that if you grew up all at once, it would break me."  


On Letting My Face Speak What's in My Heart

"One of my goals–my fuzzy goal–for 2013 is to cultivate a warmer atmosphere in my home. So much of that begins with me. And so much of that begins with the look on my face."  Great post!  

 On Friendship:
 How to Love A Mom- Annie Blogs
"When we’re together, realize that my mind is on an infinite balance beam. I’m doing my best to really engage with what you’re saying, but I’ve also got an ear on what’s happening in the backseat. It’s true, my kids are not allowed to interrupt, and they must wait patiently when two adults are talking, but I’m also having to listen for real, legitimate questions and needs that arise."  

Good list. 

I Met Someone in A Bar- Prodigal Magazine
"I can practice love and friendship like nobody’s business."  Great stuff on reaching out and being a friend.  

On Purity and Sexuality:
Posted: 05 Feb 2013 09:55 PM PST
He passed around a cup of water and asked us all to spit into it. Some boys horked and honked their worst into that cup while everyone laughed. Then he held up that cup of cloudy saliva from the crowd and asked, "Who wants to drink this?!" And every one in the crowd made barfing noises, no way, gross!...Over the years the messages melded together into the common refrain: "Sarah, your virginity was a gift and you gave it away. You threw away your virtue for a moment of pleasure. You have twisted God's ideal of sex and love and marriage. You will never be free of your former partners, the boys of your past will haunt your marriage like soul-ties. Your virginity belonged to your future husband. You stole from him. If – if! – you ever get married, you'll have tremendous baggage to overcome in your marriage, you've ruined everything. No one "This is what you are like if you have sex before marriage," he said seriously, "you are asking your future husband or wife to drink this cup."

Everyday Radical: To The Last Virgins Standing- Prodigal Magazine
"In a few days Brent will dump you. The coolest guy in school. A basketball star. And you will wonder if you should have let him. If you should have pulled the Kleenex from your bra and the bra from your body and let him.But you didn’t, and I know you feel like the last virgin standing."  

Total opposite of Sarah's story (above), but also worth reading.  

Rules for Christian sex and rules about rules 

"I’m not saying anything goes, I simply want you to treat your “biblical rules about sex” exactly the same way that you’re already treating the biblical rules about money. I want you to take the exact same hermeneutical approach that you are already taking to every biblical teaching on wealth and possessions and apply that to biblical teaching on sexuality. Then treat both sets of teachings — and other people — with more respect than your current practice seems to do with regard to either subject." 

I don't agree with everything in this post and Fred Clark drives me nutso a lot of the time, but those are good words up there.   

 Two Different Things / Sarah Markley
"When we teach our daughters and sons to be pure, should we teach them to remain virgins? Or should we teach them things like self-control, staying close to the Father, seeing the world with the eyes of Jesus and walking in moderation and righteousness? Because I will tell you this: I may have remained a “virgin” but I wasn’t walking in moderation or practicing self-control at all.  There is something desperately wrong with this equation."  


when it should be about love / see preston blog
"Because I love God, I view sexuality differently....Because I love God, it grieves me when I look upon a woman with lust, as property, because I am devaluing His creation, which He has called holy and good....Because I love God, I can look upon my past mistakes with sadness but with the hope of redemption.  And, because I love God, I know that there are more stories, more songs, and more good works to be done. "

'Torn,' Chapters 1-5- What happens when 'God Boy' is Gay
Although RHE and I have different views on sexuality, I'm linking to this one because of a particularly insightful thread in the comments section about weather you can genuinely hold a view that living an active homoseuxual lifestyle is wrong and at the same time embrace gay people as friends. I haven't had this experience in my life, but I would hope it to be a possibility.  

The Gay Community and That One Time Jesus Called me the 'N Word'- Prodigal Magazine
"But Sammy, (what some of you are thinking right now), how do you love someone whose actions or behaviors you find really unacceptable?  How can I love someone who I believe is living in sin?Great question. Do your thing Mr. C.S Lewis. “There is someone that I love even though I don’t approve of what he does. There is someone I accept though some of his thoughts and actions revolt me. There is someone I forgive though he hurts the people I love the most. That person is……me.”(If you can’t say amen, say ouch)."  

Shane L. Windmeyer: Dan and Me: My Coming Out as a Friend of Dan Cathy and Chick-fil-A
Posted: 30 Jan 2013 08:50 PM PST
"Dan, in his heart, is driven by his desire to minister to others and had to choose to continue our relationship throughout this controversy. He had to both hold to his beliefs and welcome me into them. He had to face the issue of respecting my viewpoints and life even while not being able to reconcile them with his belief system. He defined this to me as "the blessing of growth." He expanded his world without abandoning it. I did, as well."

On Gender Roles:
Posted: 02 Feb 2013 09:29 PM PST
"The reason Paul corrects women/wives in this case is not because they are women but because they are in this instance causing this problem, of course. " Interesting and thought provoking post by one of Peyton's favorites.

Women at War / Wedgewords 
This post, a few ensuing ones on this blog, and the BW3 one have me thinking about a lot of things. Post to follow soon. 

On the Sanctity of Life:
a brighter yellow: Pro-Life...What I Really Believe
"I believe that pro-life means supporting those who choose life when it would be "easy" not to- unwed mothers, teenage mothers, and mothers of those with disabilities...I believe that every Christian is called to orphan care...I believe that because we're called to love our neighbor, and we're called to peace, that includes the children in countries that our nation is currently at war with. 

I loved this post by my good friend, Kodi. Being pro-life means a lot of things to me and these are some of the biggest ones! 

The Kitchen Is Not My Office: The Day I Stopped the Car at an Abortion Clinic
"Though I know that there are other protesters, advocates for change, spokespeople and volunteers for various causes who do put their money where their mouth is, so many others do not. It is all too easy to get wrapped up in a cause or an agenda and fail to see the bigger picture, the person behind the label, the story behind the photo, the pain behind the poker face. We neglect to consider what will happen a month, a year or ten years from now. If that mother decides not to have an abortion after all, what's next?"  This post makes a good point-  that we've got to walk the walk, not just talk the talk. These women desperately need our prayers, but they have a plethora of other needs, too. Let's help meet them! 

An Open Letter / Pearl Joy Brown
"If you do read this, this is an honest invitation for you to come meet Pearl. I believe that if you can see her and hold her, you will understand the dimensions that we already understood when we were in your office, but you were not privy to at that time. I hope that all of this comes into focus clearly for you, and that you will be eager to wrap your arms around these families you are privileged to meet with. That may not be in your doctor job description, but it is in your human job description. Please do it well, and thank you for your time."  
As always, let me know if something stuck out to you!


The Niemeyer Nest said...

I read the damaged goods essay over the weekend! Lots of good points. Will read the others too! I want to do a good job teaching my kids about sex. Hard stuff for sure!

Megan said...

I look forward to this post every week - it always makes me think! I am loving the section focused on purity and virginity. What a refreshing perspective. I don't agree with everything, but I am definitely enjoying it.

Anonymous said...

I always enjoy reading your "weekly smorgasboard" posts. (I also especially enjoy reading personal, deep, genuine posts where you write about your own life). I appreciate the way you articulated that you enjoy reading different points of view, including ones you don't fully agree with. I too, enjoy expanding and rethinking my own views by reading other's differing views on significant issues. many of the links on sex- especially the "damaged goods" post and the "last virgin standing" one really resonated with me. Genuine, complex and talk about sex in an honest way that the church needs to. I loved the respect that emanated from the chick-fil-A article! Seriously awesome, and very rare in todays divisive political climate! (sorry this is getting to be a long comment! Just wanted to let you know I appreciate your blog :)